Wants ~

I am amazed by what I want to do after this few days of break. Other then focusing on my studies on my science paper, I have some fascinating dreams came to me.

First, it started with an awkward dream of me opening my own cafe. Where most of the students, be it, Lasalle Art Students or anyone,came into my cafe and started working on their work.
I am really close with them, and most of them treated this like their second home. This dream came to me as a surprise. Suddenly, I have the aim to want to open a cafe of my own, especially for teenagers or things like this.
It was a good news to me, this mean that I have some backup choices in my mind.
That means, I do not only have my doctor dream which many say is a wishful dream. I finally have some idea of what can I do other than being a doctor and saving other people life. Which was a good thing & Melvin think that this idea was not that bad either. This was the first thing that came into my life that I could consider. :)

Secondly, I want to have a job so much.
I met up with my ex-slo choir mates just now (Post on what happened will come shortly) . One is in Lasalle, as an Art Student,which mean that her arts pieces are really up there. And another, who is Zoe , who is going to end O level , like me. She is talented as in , she can be a really good salesperson . And she is very open and cool and she have such a good fashion sense too.
And she had the same dream as me once, and now she have the similar hobby that could be a job too. Which is to learn to be a barrister or a bartender.
Of cause, In Singapore, there are not much stores, to make things worst, we are only 17 years old. But I really want to work in the cafe. Should I ? I am running short of money also.

Third, I want to save up my money for many stuffs.
I want to have a bag, a prom dress, casual attires, makeup set, shoes, etc etc .
Of cause, I have my needs and my wants and I need to catereroise them properly, and think twice before buying. What are my needs and what are my wants ? So, I decided to settle on what I need first :)

HAPPY NOVEMBER

IS 1ST OF NOVEMBER ALREADY :D .
Time passes so fast, soon enough, I will be infront of my TV or out of the house on 31st, watching fireworks and counting down to 5 4 3 2 1 , Happy New Year. Blablabla.
But it comes too fast , I guess. One more month to go .
Few more days to go to officially end my Os, 2 more months to end this year 2013.
And a few more weeks to go to watch my beloved "CATCHING FIRE" .



Honestly, this time, the trailer is fantastic . At least it stop my breath for a second.  Although there was many differences comparing to the book, but overall, it is not easy to make the movie out exactly from the book, (Do not count Twilight) .  The trailer make me want to watch this series even more. Crazy indeed. I will love to see Peeta's face once again.  Alright, have fun watching, wow. I have some time life, I shall read my catching fire before the movie come out. Premier at 21st November 2013. :D
CANT WAIT !!!! 

Pft ~

Is it too early to plan to what to do now ?
I have left 2 more papers to go. I have to say, there were a mixture of happiness and sadness for this whole O level experience.
Some of the papers, I think I did better, at least better than usual. Some of the papers, I totally feel like slapping myself after the papers due to the carelessness and stubbornness in confirming the answers. Especially chem paper, I totally felt like slapping myself. The paper, itself was so easy and it was due to my stubborness, it changed the whole lot of difference in that paper. Yet, I could not change the answers anymore. Despite knowing this, I refused to move on from it. It was raining yesterday, right after the paper. The sky totally understood how I felt yesterday, it was such an heavy rain. I nearly felt like killing myself or get myself sick before Physics paper, which was the next morning.

But I did not do it , of cause. I have my split personality working well yesterday. On that one moment, I could just convince myself to end my whole education, at another second, I started to scold myself for being so foolish and all kind of quotes came into my head and into my phone. >< . (I aplogised for that spamming in the group.) I was myself.
So, in the end. I went back and panic for my physics paper, cause I do not know how to do my physics papers, or the second B part on that night before the paper.
Causing myself to stay awake till 3am last night, just to get everything stick in my mind. It was well-done to me. At least, I tried my best not to make any mistakes. :D
Yeahh.
Let's hope that my O level F&N Paper is easy. I hope I will be well prepared for it.

Dedicated to you : :)

Wow, 5 years of educations flies past me, just like that. I've made many many memories, friends and of cause knowledge, that I hope I could remember for life, but Sadly, I have to do something to the textbooks I had used for these 3 years. No worries though, I will keep my own notes, as it will become one of my memories book or past experience stuffs.
So, I prepared this post like 2 weeks before farewell assembly. (Yes, I do not study 24/7. I blogged too.), but the truth that next Friday will be the last day of school for all of us, hit me hard enough. I will miss you guys. I will definitely miss the “surrounding noises” and the talents that you all had shown in class, for example : “Yeng Yin have a talent of speaking fast.” I have classmates that could produce all sort of sneezing sounds. I have classmates that could shout as loud as Mr Ong. I have classmates that could cry easily. I also have classmates that could dance so randomly behind the scene and gave an excuse like de-stressing. Hahaha.

For classmates in Class 3A2’11 to 5A2’13 that had been with me since the first day of school:

Names: Ai Lin, Khalidah, Jiahui, Amira, Rachel, Ximin, Amanda, Marco VW, Jerry, Sultan, Shawn, Andrew, Taufiq and Benjamin.

I can’t write a long message for each of you all here. This post will be as long as a snake. So, I should generalised everything here. At the same time, I hope you like the card that I gave you and some gifts. :’)

“ I hope you felt honoured to see my changes from the age of 13 to the age of 17. If I ever did something very bad to any of you guys at any point of time between that few years. I hope you will forgive me. Forgive and Forget.
At the same time, Thank you for being so tolerating for my nonsense. As sometimes, I really pisses people off. I understand my sensitivity could make you all angry sometimes, I am so sorry. And because of you guys, I have learnt to be broad thinking and to be less sensitive. I believe that will benefits me the most. :D I am happy to know you all as my 5 years classmates. I love you guys.” And for the others in class. These 3 years have not put into waste. I always made a wish at every 11:11 that I could get close to most of you guys in class. As 3 years, they are not said to be very long, and they are not a short period of time either. So making use of that point, I do not want to have haters. I would want to be close with you guys. The journey was not easy at all. I kept saying I want to have a new starting point, but it was hard. As it start off with me being infamous, therefore it is hard for me to make friends that easily. To make things worst at that point of time was that I was quite sensitive to others’ comments to an extent. So, it was so difficult.

As days or weeks passed, I hope my behaviour improved, but I received a rumour within the class that anyone that sat beside me will be so unlucky cause of my loud volume etc etc. But in my heart, I earnestly hope that my seatmate will be my friend. I would want to start with her as my stepping stone in making friends. Yeah. I do not regret having a very special seat-mate for that past 2-3 years. Sitting beside me is a hard challenge for her. I guess. Thanks to her, I managed to change a lot and learn to behave “appropriately” and that is Haida. She mean a lot to me really. I hope you do not regret making friends with me and sitting beside me.  . Thank you in tolerating anything that I have done. For these entirely 5 years here in AMKSS, I’m glad that I made a twin friend. :D

So, as time passes, I finally get to “interact” with you guys more. I start to found out my own talent, that I could speak fast without people understanding what I am talking about. And from there, I made many different nicknames, from my movements, like yawning, talking etc. Hahah. Thanks for making me 5A2’13 ‘s Machine Gun.

Actually I want to thank Sherrie and Amira and Quanwen. They are the one that don’t judge at all ? . At least,I am happy that they do not judge me. I had fun , so much fun that I hope I could extent the PE Period longer. I love dancing with them, especially when they freestyle, all sort of dance came out. I am envious of the courage that they have.

TBH, I always want to join the group, as I am envious of the friendship that they have there, the laughters, inner jokes. Until one day, in PE, when they were dancing, I join in and Amira and Quanwen being so supportive. Thank you. Kamsanhamida. <3

Sorry for the late posting, but nonetheless, thanks everyone.

Some photos of thatday :D

Yay, My last photo in parade square. Gonna miss this place alot, when I hate & learn, when I fell & get up. I'm so gonna miss you.
My Secondary School days, thank you so much.
Sayonara alma dear.

Back on track

I have to admit. I'm really tired & I wished to stop everything now, but I had already walked that long. I should not give up now. It is not worthy.

Back to school from that one week of holidays. I did not do anything much, hence I'm disappointed it myself for this. I do not have strong motivatiom & discipline to keep myself sitting there, focus. I felt the sudden urge , when I looked at my calendar. I have less than a month before my actual Os, and I have not prepared much, to me. I felt that I could do better if I have enough discipline to force myself to study there like a hardcore mugger . This have became my top wish in my wishlist.

First day of the week. I was disappointed & motivated to start, and not stopping already. I will do all the things that I told myself to do or that I had listed down a few months ago. It is time for me to start now.
I just got back my SS & English results. I was happy for my english's results. I shown improvement in my comprehension, but I do not know about my composition yet. I do not want to give myself high    expectations, but I do not want to demote myself either. I just hope that I did not write put of point again. Previously, I did wrote out of point for my situational writing. My grammar mistakes , I hope that whatever I learnt , I could know how to use it properly , including the vocabulary words. I hope I will use it well. So my english would improve much more. I want a B4 for my Os. Please.
As for my SS , I did not do that well. My section A pulled me down so much. I got 2 '0'm for my section A . Therefore I only got 6. And my section B , 10ms . Totally pathetic and I was aiming for an A1 for Combine Humanities. I get too carried away.
I hope I could improve with the current method that I'm studying now.

Next will be F&N , I know I did not do well in this as I left many questions blank. >< .
I will work harder for my Os. I just do not want to go back to take that results  is pathetic. All the best for me now. Update later again. I do not want to go for night studies now T-T

Weird Dream I have there

I am typing this early in the morning as tomorrow will be my paper and I know last minute preparation dont really works, but at least I did something right ?

Actually the whole purpose of this post was to talk about my dream.I do not know whether I should put it in nightmare section or a sweet dream section.
It was about me going to a poly, I was selected to the course that I do not know of. If I could remember, it was the last course of that section. I was scared and reluntant to go in to that lecture hall, and if I could remember, it was in Singapore Poly, and I went into "STH Paint". For that instant moment, I do not want to go in at all.
I went in anyway. When I walked in, I do not have any friends that I know, only friends that I found familiar. I found this guy and started to ask him questions about this course e.g. What is this course about? Is it fun? And suddenly, there were many boys that came into the lecture hall and sat down at the same roll as me. I was the only female there and his hand were over my shoulder. They seems to know each other very well. I was thinking it will not turns out bad either. :)
I woke up.

I was wondering, how did I get into the course that was not even under my list of choices. Therefore, I think I should work hard & smart. It is not the end of the day even if I do not make it to the course I want, but ended up to a course I do not want. I might get something out of it, I believe. Jiayou, Abbie.
My throat hurts and it is damn sore.

Friends for 3 years = Friends for life.

I am 17, the years in my secondary school are sadly coming to an end.
For this situation, I indeed have tons of feelings, I am feeling sad, at the same time, happy & excited and at the time worried too.
5 years in AMKSS, it can said as torturous , it can also be said as memorable. I made both friends and enemies >< , Enemy that always motivates me to win them in studies. At the same time, friends that care about me. In this cruel and judgmental society, I think I need a true friend that I could talk to all the time, or being by my side, to tell me if I did this correctly or wrongly.

So, I got a score of 183 in PSLE , and went to the nearest school, I wanted to go Yishun Town, but I will ended up in NT in that school, so I managed to think twice, and my Dad want me to choose AMKSS due to the distance.
So, in the end, I got into my first choice.

I admit I am not a smart person, and I am not working very hard at the very first place. I went into 1A'09 then 2A'10 , till now 5A2'13. I got to admit, it was not easy when I first came in. I have issues with people liking me as I care how people think of me in the past. The whole miserable fact was that noone want to be my friend at all, when I stepped into that classroom, the fact that I do not wish to go to school just kept coming to me.
So, when I was in 2A, when I was Secondary 2. Some people just looked down on me, and I want to prove them wrong, and I know if I try I can. I can get the attention that I want from those guys. I want to prove them wrong, and I managed to do well in it, I got 5th in class, from 27th/40 , but of cause this leads to me bragging, and people do not like me because of my good results again.

So, at that point of time, I gave up on satisfying and meeting what they need anymore. If I get the benefits, I gain from it.I can't share this with anyone. even with the people I really love. So, I do not even bother about what people think about me, and I turns out to be a damn bitchy bitch ><
But still, I am a kind bitch, due to my natural behaviour :P 

So, with my good results , I went into my school's Thru Train class, where I have more time to study for my O levels, but one bad thing about it was that I do not have a N level to fall back on. I must past and excel in O level once and for all. (THIS IS WHAT MAKES MY LIFE CRAZY!)
I thought there was only one TT class, and ended up , we are the first batch to have 5A1 & 5A2, 2 through train classes, I find it not fair at first, cause even people that did not met the requirement went into Thru Train too. I did not get my A maths too, due to my poor maths results, and here I am suffering from coursework, re-editing and re-editing everyday.

Hahaha, but due to the small class capacity, I think having 2 classes of 27 seems better instead. Although the competition is stronger and harder to excel from it, if I try my best, maybe I could be the one of the top too, I do not want to be top, which I think is simply impossible T-T .

Having 2 classes also gains me more friends. I need friends in my life, this is a brutal truth :P
I have gained many unforgettable memories, from photos to videos to Polaroid.
Friends, have their ups & downs, I have the most of it, I guess. Friends do not automatically like me, when they see me and when they first became friends with me, I think they hate me to the core, they love to talk behind my back. Until, when time gradually changes what people think of me. I changed alot from there too, knowing that I have a natural habit of caring about what others think of me, I changed to what they want me to be, but yet what I want to be too. So, there are so many complicated things that could solve in just a few simple steps :P

 FRIENDS/CLASSMATES/LOVES:

I do not want to post any other photos between we two cause is either too glam or she edited so much, that Abbie in that photo is no longer Abbie.

Okay, this girl : Crystal Lim Yee Siew
This girl boiled my blood most of the time. I swear, it will evaporate so much and won't come down as rainfall or anything.
She is a person that I scolded the most and yet nothing went into her brain. She & I have a love-hate relationship that normal human won't understand ? She hate me when I talked some sense into her and she don't like it and she will go to her room and find one voodoo doll that looked like me and stab me. But, on the other hand, she love me so much, she just can't scold me . AWWWWWWW.
And, I'm just sick of her makeup. She totally put on her makeup all the time, I wondered if she goes to bed with it . Pftt ~ , she will know the consequence of it when she aged 40 years later.
I just hope she knows what she is doing, and do whatever she preached. :P \\

 Khalidah & Anastasia 

Me and Khalidah have been classmates and friends since Sec 1 while Ana only in Sec 3-5.
So, me and Khalidah have 5 years worth of friendship. This kind of relationship don't comes easy, I can say. Cause she was one of "haters" when she and I were in Secondary 1 -2.
She do not like me. T-T , but in the end. Most of the haters became my best friends, that's funny right. Life :P
While, Ana. She is a major bully, she is even fiercer than me, but noone disturb her, and I'm only the one being bullied T-T . I can ensure that she is a best braid queen, she could tie my layered hair into braids and without my hair above popping up, destroying the image. THANKS FOR EVERYTHING YO. :D

THE SAME GROUP/A GROUP THAT I"M JEALOUS OF:
(Consist of Amira, Ailin, Sherrie, Firman, Marco)

 A group that anyone want to join, I guess.
This group always make me jealous, cause it gave out feelings like fun, honest, true friendship.
They are a group of funny people, and the loud and randon-est people in there. Most of my nicknames are given by people of this group too, for eg , BULLETGUN, LOLKE, YANYANYAN .
Especially Firman. :P
Amira & Ailin were my classmates for 5 years too. Amira is the scariest and Ailia changes the most (Figure wise), and now even in normal clothes, she could pull it off and turns pretty. Jealous much right. Amira is a damn frank person, if she dont like, she will shout it in your face. Admire those courage too. They always sing randomly, any songs. They have the same songs genre I guess.
But, I am glad that they treat me as their friends. :D , afterall, we are classmates for the past 5years :D

Ohya,Sherrie, she is a cute person. She is so cute and she have many "boys-friend" I guess.
She have many boys talking to her. :P She got the looks and she have strong English ~~~~ :P Jealous much.hahahaha.I want to take many photos with her, really :P

Some other friends like Amanda, Ximin, Sultan, Jerry , they all brought me joy in the class. Hates for sometimes. 

I dont know if I am sensitive to people's comments or I take things too seriously, I do not know how to take jokes. This I have to agree, but in this class for 3 years, I have learnt to take things and comments lightly. What I mean was I have learn that sometimes, I should not take things seriously and make some jokes. Thanks to my class, I have learn not to rely on people's comment and fuck care their useless comments. :) and to make things better, learn to accept them and prove others wrong. I will and I can :D .

THANKS AMKSS FOR EVERYTHING , FOR MY 5 YEARS IN SCHOOL. 

They say that secondary school are where innocents and impure memories are made~. Where ever lasting friends are made there, Secondary school is a place where people do not take marks or studies seriously. I love making memories and I will continue to do so. I dont want to regret what I have not done in school, in my last years. 

Thanks friends, as I know. They will be my friends forever. People I will definitely call to my wedding (If I have one xD) 

A Short moment

Just a mini post to update my blog. I want to write a long post too, but other then schooling and studying, nothing much happened in my life. Exams are coming, my stress level are getting higher as days passed.

Lucky I have some friends that do not mind me. Or maybe they do not understand me well, but still do not mind being my friend :D ,
I am happy whoever you are, they are always with me, always by my side. I could not abandon them or reject them if they asked me for help cause they treat me like a human. I am a kind soul, it is a fact, I can never do not admit to it.

So, during a chinese lesson, I was so bored with my blended cucumber juice. :D

Trying to make my nose small. :P 

& That EELAINE just cant stop laughing. 

OUR PRECIOUS ORANGE LIPS :D

Lastly, this. :).

I am in love with collage recently, due to her recommendation. She told me to try putting all the photos into a collage. I went to download an app in my iPhone, and this happened. :D

Thanks for being my cucumber juice, you rich & fantastic english speaker. I hope to be closer with you. & I am in love with your rectangle Polaroid, me want !!! :D


Just going to end off,

- XOXO, ABBIELOKE 

Ms Chung is back !!!

Belated Post.

To my surprised, Ms Chung, my previous instructor and my favorite instructor is back.
Of cause, the one that got the first information will be Yok Hui. & she have that whatsapp group so that we could chat easily. Ms Chung was in States all along, that why. :D

I do not have much to talk to. Only photos to show. :D
Even Miss Ho & Miss Tan were back to school to see us. I was unable to leave at first due to coursework A, but I was glad that I make time for them since it will like once in a lifetime moment :D